A huge smile spread across my face this morning and my heart beamed with joy as my husband told me that he was amazed at how much of a difference it made to start your day in the word of God. Actually, his words were that it helped you to “attack your day.” For me, this was a miracle. My husband has never been much of a Bible reader. Actually, up until we started attending our church, Elevate Life Church, he prayed periodically and that was about the extent of it. He believed in God, but there wasn’t much passion or desire beyond that. Sean had always felt condemned in church and felt like he couldn’t live up to the unrealistic standards that were set. He was always under the impression that you had to essentially be perfect in order to be accepted. He even viewed God as condemning and as one who would “strike him with lightening” if he did anything wrong. It wasn’t until recently that I realized that this was the reason for Sean’s lack of desire to be involved in church.
As his wife, I was focused on what I wanted my husband to be and what he “was not.” I hate to admit it.
I love my husband tremendously, but my heart’s desire was to have a husband that fervantly sought after God with a hunger and a passion. I know that there must have been times that I was condemning towards him because he hadn’t “arrived” or wasn’t atleast seeking. I was very involved in church throughout my twenties and was quite frustrated that my husband really didn’t have a desire to get involved. He always went to church with me, made a few friends there, but that was the extent of it. I was jealous of the women whose husbands served in various roles within the church. I didn’t understand why my husband didn’t have a desire to serve in that capacity. I had such a desire to serve God deep within me and was so confused as to why my husband was on
to what others would say about him. For years, I let seeds plant in my heart…words spoken from others about what Sean should or shouldn’t do or be. Such peace came upon me when I really stopped caring about what others thought and loved him as he was because he was given to me by God.
The one thing that I did do correctly was pray for Sean’s heart to soften, for Him to be filled with a passion and desire for the things of God, and for godly men to come into his life that could build him up and influence him. Women, I can honestly say that the power of prayer and speaking encouraging words over your husband makes all the difference.
Another turning point in our relationship was when I decided to quit seeing all the things that he “was not,” start focusing on the things that he “was,” and calling him that which the Word of God says that he is. I stopped comparing him to others because he was who God created him to be. Everyone has their faults and weaknesses, but everyone also has their strengths and qualities of greatness.
Then, we were led to current church and my husband was surrounded by genuine godly men who loved Sean for who God created him to be. I am so thankful for Jim Gregg who has spoken life and encouragement into my husband and has encouraged Sean by highlighting the best in Sean. He will forever be treasured by our family for all of the kindness that he has shown my husband. Women, it is so important for your husband to be built up and encouraged by you even if he is not currently building you up. My love language is affirmation and for years I had to tell Sean to affirm me. I eventually stopped worrying about it and just loved and affirmed him. Men need strong women beside them that pray continually for them and build them up. They face so much outside the home. Their purpose is to provide for the needs of their family, and this can be a very stressful task. God allowed me to experience this stress and pressure a few months ago…it sent me into panic attacks. Men need women by their side that believe in them.
Today, my husband has a very strong desire to live a life totally devoted to God. He leads this family just as I had always prayed that He would. He was not created to serve in the church in the obvious ways (pastor, teacher, etc.) but we have discovered and are still discovering each day what he is purposed to do. It is like the child who sits in the elementary class and thinks, “But I don’t want to be a fireman, a policeman, or a mailman. However, I don’t see anything else to be.” God has a place for everyone. And like in a puzzle, he knows where every unique piece fits into His kingdom. I remembered that one of the reasons that I fell in love with him was because he was like no one else that I had ever met. I still, 14 years later, have not met anyone that is similar to my husband. He is unique, and I love him for that.
I realized after opening my eyes that many women were in the same situation that I was. I wasn’t the only woman who wished that her husband was more involved in the things of God. I found that many women simply want their husband to come to church with them. They desperately desire a man to stand up and take the reigns within the home in a loving and Godly way.
Do you long for a husband who passionately seeks the will of God for his life? What are you praying? What are you speaking over him and to him? How do you describe him to others? What do you believe that he will become? Are you condemning or uplifting? It is never too late to change….yourself or him. It takes you changing first.
As his wife, I was focused on what I wanted my husband to be and what he “was not.” I hate to admit it.
I love my husband tremendously, but my heart’s desire was to have a husband that fervantly sought after God with a hunger and a passion. I know that there must have been times that I was condemning towards him because he hadn’t “arrived” or wasn’t atleast seeking. I was very involved in church throughout my twenties and was quite frustrated that my husband really didn’t have a desire to get involved. He always went to church with me, made a few friends there, but that was the extent of it. I was jealous of the women whose husbands served in various roles within the church. I didn’t understand why my husband didn’t have a desire to serve in that capacity. I had such a desire to serve God deep within me and was so confused as to why my husband was onto what others would say about him. For years, I let seeds plant in my heart…words spoken from others about what Sean should or shouldn’t do or be. Such peace came upon me when I really stopped caring about what others thought and loved him as he was because he was given to me by God.
The one thing that I did do correctly was pray for Sean’s heart to soften, for Him to be filled with a passion and desire for the things of God, and for godly men to come into his life that could build him up and influence him. Women, I can honestly say that the power of prayer and speaking encouraging words over your husband makes all the difference.
Another turning point in our relationship was when I decided to quit seeing all the things that he “was not,” start focusing on the things that he “was,” and calling him that which the Word of God says that he is. I stopped comparing him to others because he was who God created him to be. Everyone has their faults and weaknesses, but everyone also has their strengths and qualities of greatness.
Then, we were led to current church and my husband was surrounded by genuine godly men who loved Sean for who God created him to be. I am so thankful for Jim Gregg who has spoken life and encouragement into my husband and has encouraged Sean by highlighting the best in Sean. He will forever be treasured by our family for all of the kindness that he has shown my husband. Women, it is so important for your husband to be built up and encouraged by you even if he is not currently building you up. My love language is affirmation and for years I had to tell Sean to affirm me. I eventually stopped worrying about it and just loved and affirmed him. Men need strong women beside them that pray continually for them and build them up. They face so much outside the home. Their purpose is to provide for the needs of their family, and this can be a very stressful task. God allowed me to experience this stress and pressure a few months ago…it sent me into panic attacks. Men need women by their side that believe in them.
Today, my husband has a very strong desire to live a life totally devoted to God. He leads this family just as I had always prayed that He would. He was not created to serve in the church in the obvious ways (pastor, teacher, etc.) but we have discovered and are still discovering each day what he is purposed to do. It is like the child who sits in the elementary class and thinks, “But I don’t want to be a fireman, a policeman, or a mailman. However, I don’t see anything else to be.” God has a place for everyone. And like in a puzzle, he knows where every unique piece fits into His kingdom. I remembered that one of the reasons that I fell in love with him was because he was like no one else that I had ever met. I still, 14 years later, have not met anyone that is similar to my husband. He is unique, and I love him for that.
I realized after opening my eyes that many women were in the same situation that I was. I wasn’t the only woman who wished that her husband was more involved in the things of God. I found that many women simply want their husband to come to church with them. They desperately desire a man to stand up and take the reigns within the home in a loving and Godly way.
Do you long for a husband who passionately seeks the will of God for his life? What are you praying? What are you speaking over him and to him? How do you describe him to others? What do you believe that he will become? Are you condemning or uplifting? It is never too late to change….yourself or him. It takes you changing first.
No comments:
Post a Comment